Zabuza's Day Out The Real Version!
by Sephirothlovespenguins
Summary: This is my first story. It's all about the first real mission Naruto and his squad go through you know, with Zabuza and Haku. In this story you will find out why everything you saw or read was a lie!
1. Chapter 1

Zabuza's day out-The Real Version!

By Zabuza Momochi

P.S. This is ALL true!

This is my first story, so please don't just think I'm a bad storyteller; leave comments and I'll try to make them better.

P.S. This is all true!

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Hello. My name is Zabuza. You may remember me from Episodes of naruto or from the books. Well, the story you saw or read is all wrong. In this sad tale of the mission to protect Tazuna, find out why I was not the bad guy in that whole bridge situation. Seriously, I was not evil.

Well, it all started out one day me and my friend (not boyfriend) Haku were happily having a picnic near the village hidden in the leaves.

What do you know; it just happened that it started to rain near the village. Well, Haku had made such nice sandwiches, and we didn't want our picnic to go to waste, so we just left, right then and there.

We walked for a while, and eventually we ran into a strange little fat man who promised me $1,000,000 if I could just kill this one dumb bridge-builder. Not wanting to be the one to cause trouble, Haku and I left, after all, we were pretty nice, and we would never kill a bridge-builder!

After walking some more, Haku decided to go get some berries for the picnic. But as soon as he left, that mean bully, Kakashi, and his 3 genin showed up, and started to pick on me. I tried using my words, and even tried walking away, but after a while, I knew there was no choice but to fight back.

I tried using a few weak attacks, just to see if Kakashi would get tired of fighting and run away, but to an avail. He just thought I was provoking him!

I tried talking some more, but Kakashi wouldn't listen! Every time I started talking, he attacked me! So I made a water clone and trapped Kakashi in a water prison of sorts. I thought now that he couldn't attack me, he might actually listen. But his mean genien just attacked me as soon as I started talking!

I wish that those poor genin hadn't been on his team, if they hadn't been, then maybe they wouldn't have turned out like him…

Well after a bit of beating me up, Kakashi finally broke free. I now realized that there was no other option but to fight. I started the hand signs for my water cyclone, but that cheater Kakashi used his Sharingan to copy me! Well, guess what, he beat me to the move. I lost and was pinned against a tree.

I'm sure that the poor bridge-builder they were escorting was terrified watching this battle. I would be if I knew I had to spend another day with Kakashi and his squad.

Finally Haku came back, and saved me! I think he was trying to hit Kakashi with his throwing needles, but hit me instead (he isn't a very good shot). Well after that I'm not sure what happened, because I fell unconscious. But the next thing I knew I was in a strange building with the weird little fat man again.

Sorry, but I'm still recovering from that brutal savage Kakashi's beatings, so I'll finish telling the story later. Thank you very much for listening!

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Thanks for reading chapter one (yes I know it's short). I would really appreciate it if you didn't leave bad comments, as this is my first story, so please leave helpful comments so I can make my stories better.

P.S. When I get around to it I will make chapter 2: The Fight on the Bridge!

P.S.S. I might make these things about more characters, so look for them, thx!

All Naruto character are owned by Masashi Kishimoto.


	2. Chapter 2: Battle on the Bridge

Zabuza's Day Out-Part Two

THE BATTLE ON THE BRIDGE

A note from the author: I apologize for not writing the second part to this...I really did not have any time for Fanfic for a long time, and am just now beginning to write the second part to the story. Needless to say my story telling skills have improved from all the writing classes I've been attending, so here we go:D

P.S. I am testing out writing this like a play, if I get bad reviews I'll rewrite it as the other story.

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Zabuza: Hello there, I'm glad to see you've all returned for the next part of my tale of woe.

Haku: Oh yes, it's very nice to see all of you once more! But I really wasn't expecting you...I just got out of the shower, and I have to go buy more rice cakes for the romantic dinner tonight for me and Zabu-kun.

Zabuza: I told you not to mention that!!!

Haku: Sorry! I forgot, this isn't a shipping story.

Zabuza: Uggh...well, just don't let it happen again. Don't pay attention to that last part guys! _-Zabuza tries to cover up the text to no avail- _Ahh screw it...on with the story!

The Story:

Zabuza: Well Haku, I think we need to get out of here, don't you agree?

Haku: _-Rubbing up against Zabuza-_ Yes...and tonight I can make your 'dream' come true...tehehe.

Zabuza: -_Blushing-_ Erm...well...lets head for that uncompleted bridge, we can jump off and to the other side, because we're that awesome.

Haku: Sounds like a good idea!

Zabuza: As long as that jerk Kakashi isn't there we should have no problems. I mean am I right? Just because I am a renegade Ninja, slaughtered all my classmates BY ACCIDENT when I was younger, and want to run for Mayor of the Land of Water. I think he really needs to look at his life and see what it has become...he used to be such a smart boy.

Haku: At least he's cute!

Zabuza: Riiiight...

Haku: You know he is...and so are those other two boys. I meant that blonde-haired kid the other day and he thought I was a chick. Looks like that outfit really does work, Mr. It-won't work! And even though I have yet to meet the emo-looking kid, I can tell he's extremely handsome.

Zabuza: What about that little girl? I thought you'd be more into her...?

Haku: That little tramp?! Yea right!

Zabuza: Well...whatever, we're here now.

Haku: Oh goodie! -_Haku bounces up and down merrily_-

Kakashi: Stop right there before I decide to kill you.

Zabuza: O-oh, Kakashi, w-what brings you o-out on a nice d-d-d-d-d-day like this?

Kakshi: Gimme your cash.

Zabuza: I'm standing up to you! I will not give you any money!

Kakashi: Then I'll kick your ass!

_-Zabuza runs away with Kakashi following him-_

Kakashi: Naruto and Sasuke, kill that little twerp!

Haku; Teehee...come and get me boys.

So anyway, I tried to run away and get away from Kakashi, but all he did was follow me. I swung at him with me sword, y'know, to get him to maybe jump back a bit and gimme some elbow room, but he just blocks it with his hand! This guy is nuts! So I ran over to Tazuna to see if he wouldn't mind talking to Kakashi. And maybe I had a kunai knife out...but even so!

Zabuza: Please sir, tell this nut-job to stop attacking me!

Tazuna: HEEEELLLPP!! HEEELLLLLPPPPPP HE'S GONNA KILL ME!!! HEEEELLLPPPPP!!!

Zabuza: Please shut up, I really don't have time for this...I just want to go home...

Tazuna: HEEELLLPPPPP!!!

Zabuza: Hello little pink haired girl, can you please tell him to calm down, or tell Kakashi to leave us alone?

Sakura: HEEELLLLPPPP!!!!! CHA I'LL KILL YOU!!!

Zabuza: Of fine, you're of no use you jerk.

I tried creating some mist to lose Kakashi in, and do you know what he does? It's nuts, he sets like eight freaking dogs on me! What the HECK is this guys problem?!

Sorry...lost my temper there for a sec. Anyway, I'm pretty beat at this point, as Kakashi has nearly severed my arm, set dogs on me and kicked me in the face. Haku was faring much better.

Haku: Anyway, I had been creating some mirrors to look at myself in, when this two sexy looking kids walked in and decided to fight.

Sasuke: I will avenge my clan! Itachi killed them and I'm gonna kill you to prove I'm strong! Then I'll face him and win because I beat you!

Naruto: Idiot, this is the Cartoon Network translation, American audiences don't know that happened!

OOC: Sasuke: Wait wait wait, you're telling me, this whole story is translated from a Japanese story?

Naruto: Yep! With bad translations and everything.

Sasuke: Bad translations are am to being not the here I not see?

Naruto: Someone set us up the bomb!

Sasuke: I are see dead peoples am to being dead!

Naruto: Engrish!

IC:

Haku: Now you're trapped in my ice prison! I'll let you go free if you just apologize!

Naruto: SHADOW CLONE JUTSU!

Haku: N-no, I said apologize...

Narutos: BELIEVE IT!!! BELIEVE IT!!!

Haku: Believe what? What do I believe??!!

-_Haku slaughters all of the clones and knocks Naruto to the floor_-

Naruto: Ok, even though that didn't come even close to working, I'll just try it a few hundred more times.

-_After a few THOUSAND more tries from Naruto and protests from Sasuke, haku is getting tired._-

Sasuke: He's slowing down! Now I'll burn the edge of his skirt with a fireball!

-_The fireball burns the edge of the skirt/dress and Haku is crestfallen_-

Haku: T-that sniff was a one of a kind...I'LL KILL YOU!!! cries No I won't!!!

Sasuke: Look! The little twerp is mad cause his dress got burned! Haha!

Haku: EAT THIS! -_Haku throws a bunch of throwing needles into Sasuke's neck_-

Sasuke: Doesn't look tas-blarg!

Naruto: You killed my friend! Now I'm really angry! You wouldn't like my when I'm angry!!!

Haku: Oh shi-

-_Naruto smashes the mirror so hard, that he defies the laws of physics and knocks Haku out of somewhere that he shouldn't have been in the first place_-

Haku: Nooooo!!!!!! You beat me out of a mirror! Now kill me because I'm bored.

Naruto: Umm...can I have your wallet first?

Haku: No.

Naruto: Ok, chaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!

Haku: Wait no, actually I don't wanna die, cya!

Naruto: Sakura! GET OUT OF THE WAY I CAN'T STOP!

Sakura: CHA!! Waaaaahhh! CHA! Waaaaaah! Sasuke is dead! SCHIZO!! WAAAAHHHHH!!!

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Well, anyway, thats all for now. Expect the final conclusion of Zabuza's day out, only here on Cartoon Network! Where we kill everything thats beautiful!

Author's note: Well anyway, thats it for this segment of the story. Check back in a little while for the next part.

P.S.: I love ya all.

P.S.S. Gaara is teh pawnage

P.S.S.S. Toph and Hinata have no character depth (inside joke)

BYE:D


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